HOW BERNARD CHAPIN LIBERATED ME FROM THE LEFT

((Warning: that title has very little to do with THIS post, although I WILL be glorifying Mr. Chapin in future posts, not too surprisingly!)

When Mincing, Hand-Rubbing, Leering French Paedophiles start thinking too obsessively about Little Boys’ B|_|tth0les, they increase their likelihood of getting overly excited, which leads to them licking and smacking their lips excessively. Not too surprising. This Constant Lip-Licking leads to a Nonfatal but Embarrassing Medical Skin Condition called “perleche”, which is French for “Excessive Licking of the Lips Caused by French Paedophiles getting excited over Little Boys’ B|_|tth0les.” In USA we call it “angular cheilitis” and it can unfortunately occur to Straight, Alpha, Non-Boy-Molesting Men such as Your Humbly Narcissistic Narrator.

This has only been happening in the past year of my life or so. I tend to get very chapped lips during the winter which I treat with liberal amts of Chap Stick, sometimes the tingly “Medicated” variety. I assumed that the dry, cracked corners of the mouth were simply how “chappiness” presents in that region of the Lips. Then it persisted after the exit of winter. A little research taught me about the Paedophiles and that it may in fact be caused by a BACTERIA or FUNGUS because either you DROOL while you sleep, or have terrible HYGIENE, or have low Iron, and sh!t starts FESTERING in the corners of your mouth. And here I was making fun of “Cvntfungus” or “Funguscvnt” or what have you, when I have a filthy festering neckbeard no-hygiene MOUTH teeming with FUNGUS. This, like Thinning Head-Hair, is one of the biggest Tests to your Confidence that an Alpha Male can face, but, if endured, will make you a more successful, dividend-reaping Alpha. Separates the Men from the Boys, the Alpha Pv$$y-Pounders from the Omega Virgins.

My diet is not ideal and my Constant Chronic Fatigue leads me to suspect that an Iron Deficiency / Anaemia might be going on; I’ve also heard that B and “B Complex” Vitamins might be similar to Iron in this respect. So I went to Meijer, despite their MISANDRIC COMMERCIAL about “motivating your lazy, useless husband to get off his useless, lazy, loser @55, sleeping like an unemployed, umemployable BUM in the HAMMOCK to actually make himself USEFUL FOR ONCE and do some Yard Work! He’d better shape up because You’re still 39 And Hot & High-Powered and can Get a Younger, Hotter, More Muscular, More Successful, Bigger, Handsomer, Taller, Stronger, Winninger Man!” but since Meijer is Signif Closer than Walmart, and BECAUSE it’s Close and HAS Everything, it’s basically the Only Place I “Shop”, and purchased some QTips, Apple Cider Vinegar, Vaseline, “Extreme Multivitamin”, and B-Complex Vitamins.

And that’s the 417 word story of me Being The Bo55 of an Embarrassing Medical Condition that could have potentially cost a few 18-year-old B4ngs.

I LIKE sitting here and writing narcissistic nonsense. So why didn’t I take my Interest and hone it into a Skill (i.e., something One is GOOD at) and then develop that skill into a Hot Skill, and then make that my Career? This is a perfect example of the type of Navel Gazing which typified the Old Blog and which MUST not Taint the New Blog. Because “majoring” in “journalism” at a “university” would have been only marginally more useful than what I did Major in, and still No Contest to a Good Hard STEM major. And that Journo Programs are more likely to be a huge joke and Permeated By The Left than they are not, and when I was Young, I was unfortunately very susceptible to Leftist Emotion, and not sure I would have Gone My Own Way without my Grateful, LUCKY Discovery of A NonLeftist Male Mentor, and I didn’t discover Bernard Chapin until well after my College Years. And, finally, because the alternative choice to a writing career outside of Journalism, ie, “Creative” Writing, well I could barely muster up the stomach to write the words, without dying of laughter, or Flipping The Table in a Rage. “Creative Writing” ain’t NO kind of Writing, and even LESS of a Life Worth Living!

I’m sure there are Bourgiversity Writing Students out there who do an Independent Study and have a Huge Blog BE their Honours Thesis, and then they coast into a Dream Career Job writing for The Nation or Harpers or Dave Eggers or NYT or CNN or AP or Reuters or wherever Professional Leftist SWPL Careerist Writers Work (With Benefits!). (Yes, I’m aware that the majority of Professional Writers do Freelance Work.) Still, I would rather be a Shop Rat and Work For My Money, and then try to write in my Free Time, non-free-lance. IMHO, making Writing Your Career takes a lot of Integrity out of it, unless you’re one of the Top 1% Writers. You’re MUCH more likely to keep your Integrity AND make a Good Solid Alpha Living being A STEMgineer, so don’t even take the chance – just SHUT DOWN ALL the Humanities and Social Sciences and Journalism and Arts and Poyetry and Non-STEM University Departments, PERIOD. FULL STOP. END OF STORY. FOREVER.

“Sounds like the talk of somebody who just wasn’t GOOD enough to make it as Professional Writer, to cop-out and say they never Wanted to be a ‘sell out pro writer’ anyway!”

Marxist, Feminist Chicoms!

Yes, I enjoy listening to Rush Limbaugh, but I don’t think I “mindlessly parrot” his words, even though I do enjoy USING his words, and other “stereotypical tea party / rightist” jargon. Chicoms, Lamestream Media, etc.

How do you measure the WORTH of a Man? A man gets scored 20% for getting Bigboy Benefits (some sort of health care at least) with his Bigboy Job. The Actual 50 hours of Work per week at your Bigboy Job count for the remaining 80%. Therefore, if you’re a OWS Handout-Seeking Socialist Slob who only “works” 30 hours a week at the Coffeehouse with No Health Care Bennies: -20 for no bennies to get 80%, and then 30/50, then times that by 80, and final answer, 48%. You are 48% Of A Real Man. Your opinion counts for 48%, you get 48% of a vote, etc. Note: you DO have to be a 100% Man to Pull Pv$$y that’s at least a 7. The highest a 99% Man could pull is about a 6.9. So the highest a 48% Man could pull is approx 3.44. Do you want to be pulling 3’s and living in your Parents’ Basement the rest of your 48%-Worthwhile Life??! Then go out there and do what your parents and betters did, and get a Bigboy Job, Scumcvnt! Stop WHINING and Start WORKING!

(go to1:29)

Very Important Clarification: Although an unwashed, Lip-Smacking OWS Might Well use the above paragraph as “Satire”, let me clarify my Complex and Nuanced Position that: A Man should NOT be measured solely by his Work or shamed for his Career “deficiencies”, although We MGTOWs and Red Pillers will see this sentiment in The Real World Everyday Everywhere; and though I may share my belief with OWSers, my similarity with them starts and ENDS right there. I mock them as Pathetic, Lazy, Entitled, Spoiled Leftists and Hippies and Communists, and I DO have a SERIOUS appreciation for the Notion of Hard Work. Which I will have to Enlarge later, because this post is now 1169 Words. Have A Nice Day.

Also, this post is worth $30 because I DID do 2 minutes of editing after the initial 1,000-word Dump. Actually lemme bump it up to $35 because although I’ve made at least $90 of Fake Money so far, BUT I would like to expand and increase that revenue stream slowly but constantly. $90 is good, but it’s not good enough.  1234 not bad! 1000 nextime.

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